Post-Post Op Post

So after surgery I couldn’t do anything with my right hand which sucks because it’s incredibly dominant.  As in Ol’ Lefty can’t do anything.  Toilet time is the worst.  THE WORST.  Aquarium maintenance is fucking awful but I must say, my back and left arm hurt a LOT so I guess I have that going for me.  The last time my left arm was stronger than my right arm was when I cashiered; right hand grabs the stuff, left hand bags and puts it in the cart.  It’s really weird to use my left hand and I have to stop myself from grabbing things with my right hand out of habit.  So, here’s what I did while I was being pathetic:

BOOKS

They were all so young and the pictures are so haunting.

I read Dead Mountain: The Untold True Story of the Dyatlov Pass Incident.  I’ve loved this story since I was a child and I was always in the paranormal conspiracy camp.  This book gives some real discussion as to what exactly happened and I think the answer makes a lot of sense.  The only part of the book I didn’t like was that it was half story, half introspective writing and the introspective part bored me.  I can say that it really built up to the ending and explored all the angles.  All in all, it’s a real tragedy no matter what you think happened.

Meow. MEOW.

Second book was The Cinder Spires: The Aeronaut’s Windlass by the amazing Jim Butcher.  I’m totally a fangirl but when I started reading it, it wasn’t exactly my cup of tea.  For about two pages and then I read it all in one day.  That’s the real fucking shit right there–I wait for months if not years for a new book to come out and the authors have the gall to write a book that I read non-stop in one day.  Lather, rinse, repeat.  So discourteous.  It’s a steam-punk world and the writing is very visual.  I felt like I could absolutely see everything.  If you’ve read The Codex Alera series and of course The Dresden Files some of the ideas and imagery will be familiar but I’m not giving anything away.  I am not saying that he writes some timeless literature, but I will say he writes damn good fucking stories that I can’t put down and I want to binge read them until my eyeballs fall out.

He’s going to be at Dragon Con this year and the Mr. and the Boy are going AND I AM NOT BECAUSE THE WORLD ISN’T FAIR but hopefully the Mr. will get Jim’s autograph on a piece of sheet music that I have.  Then again, I bet they won’t even get his autograph because the lines will be crazy pants.  Maybe I’ll just write him a fan letter and enclose the sheet music for him to sign.  Because that won’t make me sound crazy.

Fan Girls Gone Wild

Last but not least, I read Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns).  A fun, quick read that was overly relatable in some places but not so much in others.  You have friends?  You have family?  Okay, Miss Perfect!  But seriously, I thought it was an honest little memoir, funny, and interesting without the gut wrenching confessions that you get in a lot of these types of books.  As in, normal girl does well!  Let’s congratulate her on not getting pregnant at 14 and becoming a heroin addict!   I want to be best friends with her but I’m 100% not cool enough.

NETFLIX AND TV AND CHILI DOGS

There was no Netflix and chill, but there was cravings for chili dogs but I couldn’t drive so I had to settle for nothing.  Story of my life.  Binge watched Expedition Unknown because I like Josh Gates and I miss Destination Truth.  This episode in particular scared the shit out of me.

I also binge watched The Dead Files.  I want so, so badly for it to be real.  I know it’s probably not, but I like it.  Steve DiSchiavi gives it credibility in my mind.  I want it to be real.

I do, I really, really do.

I also think that Amy Allen looks like Flo from the Progressive Insurance commercials.  Google “Amy Allen faces” to get a chuckle.

Twinsies.

I did watch some movies too, for as much as I could stay awake for.  Drugs are one helluva drug.  Lots of fun silliness–I couldn’t concentrate for the more serious films (sorry, Jiro Dreams of Sushi).

I have also been playing a lot of Civ IV because I don’t need two hands for that.

And that really sums up my exciting adventures.  Whee.

Father’s Day Nerd Fun

Ahh, Father’s Day weekend, one of the better times of year.  Usually because Father’s day means I get to go out to dinner and eat steak and possibly watch a movie.  I mean, I have to go with the Mr. and the family but I’d probably do that anyway, so that’s fine.

We *finally* went to see World of Warcraft!  I loved it!  I know, surprise, right?  Truthfully, I had serious concerns.  Let’s face it—fantasy movies have a high possibility of horribleness.

Not all of them.  I mean, some are horrible in the best way.

So first, all of the things I liked:

I didn’t get it at first.

Anduin Lothar: I have nothing bad to say about a young Anduin Lothar. Great acting and completely believable as the loyal hero of legend.  “Who needs boots when your giant balls can keep your feet warm?” – actual quote from the movie*.

I do parties. In fact, I am the party. Click his face for more!

(Former?) Apprentice Khadgar: LOOK AT BABY KHADGAR! You can really see the snarky Archmage in this character and I felt like you could get the sense of the power of his real natural abilities.

All the other things:  While we did wait to see the movie specifically for Father’s Day weekend, I can honestly say I avoided everything possible regarding the movie so that I could be surprised when I saw it.  I didn’t know who was playing who other than Travis Fimmel in the part of Anduin Lothar.  The background shots were exquisite.  The costuming was so accurately detailed and felt so true to the lore, the stories, the games, the books.  Buildings, animals (HOLY SHIT THAT GRYPHON), the ambiance via the towns people, the murlocs, the panning views across Elwynn Forest!

Medivh:  The acting and power were there, actual lore, not so much.  I did appreciate how large scale spells are depicted which stays truer to lore compared to video game mechanics.  I will say I really, really hate how they tinkered with his story, but it’s a good excuse to post this clip.

And for bonus, another cinematic for the upcoming release of Legion.  I haven’t pre-ordered but I will.  Probably a week before launch because I’m lazy.  The cover of Dust in the Wind on top of the graphics is really moving.  I may or may not have cried in the movie theater when this showed.  Don’t judge me.

Now, onto the parts of the movie that I believe fell short.  I give this movie a 7 out of 10 which sounds incredibly harsh but the opportunity for improvement was so high.  I am going to write this as spoiler-free as possible, but it’s also possible I’m the last person on the planet to have seen the movie since it’s been out a whole week and a half.

Knowledge is power.

I do not take the honor of Loremaster lightly.  The story that was written for Garona was so watered down and stylized.  Unnecessary changes.  I understand the use of plot device and the movie is not the book, not the game, and not the lore.  But come on.  She is translating for a Draenei at the beginning of the movie FFS!  Maybe the sequels will make it all come together, but there was NO REASON FOR IT TO NOT BE TOGETHER NERD RAAAAAGE!

She’s making that face because her story doesn’t make sense.

 

That armor is for show. FOR SHOW I SAY!  Garona is still making that face.

King Llane.  Nice enough guy.  Behavior of a king?  Give me a fucking break.  His actions are not the actions of someone who trusts in The Guardian and there was no reason for him not to.  While the scene (and if you’ve seen it you know what I’m talking about) was necessary to move the story along quickly, the decision was not his to make.  I’m not going to spoil it BUT COME ON AGAIN.  I am writing in ALL CAPS AND SAYING NOTHING BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN IT WAS SO DUMB HOLY FUCK WHAT A WIENER.

Blame Pip. It’s always PIppen’s fault.

The foreground plants.  This is the dumbest, nit-pickingist of them all but the fucking plants.  The ents in LOTR: The Two Towers ruined plants in movies forever.  Look at how fake that shit is.  I want real motherfucking ents.  PAY MORE FOR THE REAL THING, HIRE ENTS NOT PEOPLE IN ENT FACE. A desert/dry area scene and a spot overlooking the orc camp.  This kind of detail pisses me off.  There were plenty of other outside scenes where the setting is perfect.  One unnatural, plastic-y rustling and my suspension of disbelief is out the window.

Orcs.

Because this makes more sense.

Did we have to change the story behind every major orc character?  Really?  That’s not how this works!  That’s not how any of this works!

Your skin is green because you are full of lies.

7 out of 10 isn’t bad.  I’d own it, but not pay to see it again in the theater.  I loved it more than I didn’t and as far as movies made from video games, comic books, novels, etc, I’d say it did well.  The onus is on the second movie now to show why all these changes were made and to move the story along at an acceptable pace.

Overall a good Father’s Day.  It’s usually an easy time to get lost in nostalgia but this is the first time in a long time that it felt as if we were all living in the present.

A nice present indeed.

*actual quote is actual quote.  Watch the movie, it’s in there.

ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod

I have been living under a fucking rock or something.  I missed this FilmDrunk post from 4/4 about a little movie called Only God Forgives.  Baby Goose is in it:

I like to imagine these directors work with him, and then Baby Goose goes home and the directors get all sad and lonely, so they secretly take the shirt he wore home from wardrobe and sleep with it, and then they dream about him all night and wake up with the room smelling like butter and maple syrup. It’s Baby Goose magic. He’s like Santa Claus, only cuter.

Did you know it opens on my birfday?  You bought me gratuitous violence for my birthday?  How did you know?  IT’S MY FAVORITE!

Two more trailers in today’s post from FilmDrunk.  I didn’t think I could love FilmDrunk more than I already did, but OH MY.

Maybe it’s the music.  Maybe it’s the Thai setting.  Maybe it’s because the corrupt police officer looks a little bit like my friend’s Dad.  Most likely it’s the violence.  Either way, I’M SCREAMING BECAUSE I’M EXCITED!