Barf

I can’t sleep. I have a baby who hates me. Therefore, after only getting either 90 mins of sleep total, or being interrupted every hour for 5 hours until we decide to just fucking get up at 5:30 AM, I am pretty dead.

Dead enough to fall asleep on the road.

And by road, I mean I-285.

So today, I thought I would experiment with a widely known, widely used energy drink, Red Bull.


Bull Shit

I might die, because this tastes like some sort of fruit flavored, carbonated baby medicine. Or dentist fluoride, you know the gel shit they put in the tray and make you sit there and suffer? Yeah that’s what this tastes like. Why don’t all drugs taste like this? Just say no, indeed.

How long does this take to kick in? I mean, I feel like crap so is that the result I’m to expect? I kind of feel like bleaching out my mouth, so maybe that’s what’s supposed to happen. In other news about how to legally kill myself, I bought a 6 pack of this today:


I like how they call it a shot, like alcohol or heroin.

I’ll see if I need to take my 5-hour energy shot today. It comes in orange, lemon-lime and berry. I am betting this also tastes like medicine or vomit or evil. I’ll let you know.

**UPDATE**
I did try that 5 hour energy thingy and it wasn’t bad, though it did give me a hot flash like it warned. Or niacin flush as they call it. It was more like a 2 hour energy shot though. Maybe it’s for people who get more than 4 hours of sleep, who knows.

2 thoughts on “Barf

  1. From Veronica
    The 5 hour Energy thing says “Chaser” on it, so I’m thinking that you either need to be drunk before you drink this or have a beer handy for after you do…
    Just a thought!

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