Twinkie Power

This post is late in coming, but still applicable. As shocking as it sounds, I am so not white. I know, what gave it away, right? It reminds of an old joke I heard once “I’m Jewish, and I can tell that other people are Jewish just by looking at them. Like how Black people can tell that other people are Black just by looking at them”.

Anyway, I am married to a very white, very southern Mr. and a couple weeks ago he said that he feels like he got ripped off when he married me. Which sounds really bad out of context. But he was talking about the food. Apparently I need to be less Paula Deen and a little more Yan Can Cook without the penis. To be clear though, he didn’t want less fried chicken and BBQ, he just wanted more Chinese/Thai/Miscellasian cooking. So what the hell, I didn’t have anything better to do and I went and shopped my non existant Asian ass off:


I miss the steamed meat and veggie filled buns; red bean paste is too sweet for me.


Flour to make the little steamed buns that I wanted (no bean paste!), MSG is good for you and me, and panko bread crumbs which I really have no idea what I’ll use them for, because I don’t make anything gourmet enough that needs panko as opposed to cheapy Kroger brand bread crumbs in a can.


Dried mushrooms, dried red chili peppers (isn’t that a band :P), dry sherry, Chinese five spice, sesame oil, sweet & sour sauce, hoisin sauce, weird half used stick of butter.


My second favorite pre packaged Asian things ever: soybean drink and chrysanthemum tea. Yeah, I drank them both, so what? And while I perused the cookbook that I’ve had since forever, I didn’t see anything that I was going to make anytime soon.


My favorite pre packaged and fresh fruit ever of all time is lychee. DELICIOUS! And not at all weird in texture like Molly says. She can’t eat anything good :P So after all of that shopping, I made this:


Chinese BBQ Pork Fried Rice (chinese bbq pork, chicken, peas, rice, eggs) and spring rolls! In spring roll wrappers, not those bumpy egg roll wrappers. Vote Yes for Spring Roll wrappers! The spring rolls were an experiment of memory to find out how much I really remember from my childhood. I think I forgot the bean sprouts, but I’ll try it next time. I did a pretty good job, and the Mr. has renewed faith that I do love him, because no one would spend that much time making eggrolls for someone she hates. Unless they’re poison. Which they were not.

One thought on “Twinkie Power

  1. Ok. Yeah. I’m hungry now… And I just ate 11 chicken wings!
    You’re such a good wifey poo. I’m too lazy and enjoy eating out too much to cook for my boyfriends lol.

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